Nuclear Babies

[WP] Nuclear war has just ended and only a handful of children remain. The children survived because they chose to hideout in a garbage dump, nobody would waste a nuke on garbage. The world now decimated, the children need to rebuild and learn through anything they find in the garbage.

"Garbage babies, attack!" a team of mutated garbage kids started swinging their tentacles and running towards a pack of gigantic mutated rats.

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Evil Day

[WP] When he turned on the faucet this morning, blood poured out.

Robert woke up and walked to his bathroom. When he turned on the faucet, his bath started filling with dark scarlet liquid. He looked at himself in the broken mirror and smiled.

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How to become a serial killer in 21 easy steps

If you are considering buying this book, it is probably because on your road to self discovery you have found out that you want to kill people. Congratulations! By buying this book you can take the first and the most important step towards fulfilling your passion and having the life of your dreams.

In this book you will learn things like:

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The only thing that I have ever knew was void. You could say that it surrounded me forever since there was no time before I created it. At first all I was was awareness, just the sense of conciousness with nothing else. Gradually, I started to think thoughts in the midst of this void. I've made up time and space. And once I was thinking in this emptiness I got horribly bored. So I've turned my thoughts into figures and images. I've imagined light, which turned into stars and galaxies and later - planets. And thus Maya was born.

On one of the planets I have created animals and humans, just in one whim of my desire. I could simulate the whole history of this universe starting with the Big Bang, but I didn't bother, waiting for billions of years would be too boring, besides the time was made up anyway, so I've just skipped right to the interesting part - the year 1983, the moment my imagined humans invented the internet, and started their race towards singularity.

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[WP]: Describe the ugliest person imaginable using only praises and compliments

She was more handsome than a barfing snail. When people looked at her they couldn't look away, and dreamed about her for weeks after, waking up screaming every night. Her hair were like an ocean, a very deep ocean with terrifying creatures underneath. She had beautiful blue eyes, a lot of them, looking kindly at each other. What can I say, that girl stole my heart. And refused to give it back until I kiss her. That was a wonderful moment I won't be able to forget for the rest of my life, no matter how hard I try.

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Drug Lord

Prompt: You're the biggest drug lord the world has ever seen. The angel of death visits you on your deathbed and allows you to plea your case as to why you deserve to get into heaven.

I have made a lot of money by helping people to exercise their freedom to do whatever they wanted. Old fat douchebags in the government were trying to dictate people what they can and can not do with their bodies, with their oives, and I have rebelled against that and gave that choice back to people.

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Modern Day Robin Hood

Propmt: In modern day America, you lead a group of criminals who steal from the 1% by any means necessary, to give to the people who need money the most. You are the hood, and this is the story of The Merry Men.

Elon Musk, Mark Zukerberg, Jeff Bezos, Larry Page, Warren Buffett, countless people who's names you don't know, people who run oil companies and banks, who create everything from cars to cereal boxes, who control the industry, are in my power. All fallen to our attacks.

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Prompt: At age 18, you are able to trade in a percentage of your physical beauty for an equivalent amount of intelligence, or vice versa.

"Oh, my god, this is the dream come true!" I exclaimed, when I first heard about it.

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Accident X

Prompt: Your job involves computers and you work nights. One night you are dozing off but every 5 minutes you reach up and tap a random key on the keyboard without looking to keep your computer from going to sleep. Half through one shift, you look up and see you've done something terrible.

I felt desperately bored in this mind-numbing job. I just had to sit here all night and monitor cameras.

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Dream World

Propmt: While in a dream, you find yourself in the Dream Hub, a place where dreamers can meet.

I woke up and called David. "Hey, man, sorry for calling at 4 AM, and I know it's going to sound weird, but... 3-17-orange-duck. Do you have anything to say to that?"

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Prompt: You have just created an intelligent civilization and universe with a highly innovative simulation. You are praised throughout the world as a hero, but there is one problem. Your simulation thinks that they created you.

I have created a world. Mainframe in our company has simulated every atom in the universe starting from the big bang, and now here we are. I look at the rendering of the world, and see myself staring at the rendering of the world I have created.

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Odd Thoughts #1

I have been reading xkcd, turns out that out of 28 people struck by lighting in 2012, 13 were standing under the trees. That might not be wise, but I wonder what the other 15 were doing? Were they running naked through empty fields, waving their arms, flipping off the sky and screaming "FUCK YOU, GOD!!"

I don't understand why people don't wear seatbelts. Why wouldn't they? Just to be cocky? Putting yourself in unnecessary danger is not cool, its stupid. I mean it's not like not wearing s seatbelt will score you any points with chicks.

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New Job

[WP] A secret agent has applied for a new job in order to assassinate a target. However, the agent enjoys their new job and wants to stay.

"Dammit, Johnson! Do your job!"

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[WP] You are a scavenger who has lived your entire life in a post apocalyptic wasteland. One day, you stumble onto a bunker and open it. Inside is a friendly looking old woman, who adjusts her reading glasses, brushes the dust off her apron, and says "Oh? Is it safe to go out on the surface now?"

I have been traveling these deserts alone for many decades. During all this time I didn't meet a soul. That was why I was shocked to find a 80-year-old lady sitting in a bunker.

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Zombie Apocalypse

[WP] a zombie apocalypse occurs, the weak and inadequate are killed, but 500 years later the natural selection of the apocalypse leaves only the strongest and brightest to breed and rebuild. Everyone is the best of the best.

"Welcome everyone to the 500 anniversary of a zombie apocalypse celebration party! Today we celebrate the biggest tragedy in the history of humanity, that has also turned out to be our greatest fortune. Just in 28 days all of the humanity's problems were solved. Global warming, starvation, lack of energy and resources, all wars and conflicts. All thanks to the unnamed hero, the mad biohacker, who, using his home-grown, genetically modified virus, did what the rest of our ancestors never had the balls to do - wipe out 98% of living humans.

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